Friday, July 6, 2012

Quotation Of The Day: Schizophrenic Jesus Edition

Relevant hits its American Christian readers where they live:.
The conceptions of Jesus vary wildly, but one thing is for sure: When Christians imagine Jesus, He is largely schizophrenic. He loves me enough to forgive me for sleeping with my girlfriend, but when I fail to have devotional time six days in a row, He’ll likely punish me in some passive-aggressive way, like giving me a cold or making my tire blow out on the freeway. He doesn’t care enough about my prayers to make Aunt Jodie’s cancer go away, but He’ll occasionally answer fervent prayers for a parking spot at the mall so I can make it to the movies on time—because Jesus desperately wants me to see The Dark Knight Rises and not miss the previews


D.E. Bishop said...

Yup, the rightwingers think of Jesus that way, but it's not in the Bible. According to the bible, Jesus never did anything to hurt anyone. He did advise them of the consequences of their actions.

In fact, Jesus required nothing - nada - zero, of all the people he healed. Check it out. He never said, "Well, before I heal you, have you been to synagogue lately?" or "Yeah, I can see you have a fatal disease, but first, what is the total of your dead animals sacrifices to the priest at the temple?" Like I said, check it out.

That schizophrenic Jesus of the righties is a figment of their imagination. And of course, of the tv preacher/politicians who make BIG BUCKS off fearful people.

LK said...


I can certainly see what you mean. When I posted the quotation, however, I was sort of looking in the mirror at the paragraph about personal prayer.

I like to think of myself as having a bit deeper faith, but too frequently, I mutter the quick thoughtless prayer for the parking spot.